Tuesday, July 20, 2010

dreaming about august

I like drawing.  I don't really do it enough.  And when thinking about my Etsy shop, I was so tired of looking at my junky Etsy banner that I was inspired to create this new one.  I'm not sure if it's officially finished, but I wanted a change to represent me and the cute things I'm planning on selling in my shop.  Who could resist clicking on my shop to check it out after seeing a cute drawing of my hammie girls?

In case you're wondering, that's Zippy on the left and Bella on the right.  I'm planning on making a variety of things for my Etsy shop, most notably silver jewelry featuring hand-formed and hammered wire shapes, semi-precious and precious gemstones (you should see my stash waiting to be turned into something great), and sea glass; hand-sewn plushies featuring the hammie girls first and then more inspirations to come; and paper crafts such as cards, etc. (I have 9 pounds of colored scrapbook paper, various colored cardstock, and all sorts of fun stuff like buttons, ribbon, sequins, feathers...all waiting to be played with).

Along with these creations, I'll need to make some business cards featuring images of my work, work on promoting the shop, gather packaging supplies, blogging more and taking/editing photos.  Lots of busy but fun work ahead!  I'm not sure how things will go on the job front, but I'll keep my eyes open while I dive fully into working on this stuff.  Hopefully the bf and I can figure something out.  I've been feeling really overwhelmed lately about my finances, but I think I'll feel better once the Bar and MPRE are over and I can focus on actually DOING something rather than just worrying about it.  It'd be nice to make some sales to earn some extra money to help pay the bills as my loan money is almost running out.  Money always has a way of going out easily but sure has a hard time coming back in.  Fingers crossed the bf's job situation is stable for a while.  He says not to worry so I guess I'll try not to at the moment.

For now, the Bar exam awaits in a week and I am far from being ready.  But I know I'll get there, as long as I apply myself.  The bf says I shouldn't worry too much about counting down the days and stressing but rather, I should focus on making the most out of each day and just working hard on that.  He's so wise, haha.  The Bar exam is about minimum competency, but it's just a lot of information to store and dump onto the exam pages in a limited amount of time and a whole lot of pressure.  CA has one of the hardest exams, too.  But, at this point, I just have to try to learn as much as I can and know what I know well rather than trying to memorize everything under the sun, which is completely impossible.  The CA Bar is a 3-day exam consisting of 6 hours each day and will encompass 6 one-hour essays on any of 13 subjects (testing both Federal and CA law, where applicable), 200 MBEs (multi-state multiple choice that everyone in the country will take on Wednesday at the same time, covering 6 subjects solely on Federal and common law), and 2 three-hour performance tests.  The Exam will run over next Tuesday through Thursday.  Yeah, fun stuff, right?

It's all definitely a test of endurance - mental, physical, and emotional.  I'm at the point where I'm not sure what's going to happen but I think it's important that I work hard and try my best (as that's all I can ask of myself) and see what happens when results come out in November.  I think I'll know afterwards if I thought it went well or not.  I've felt that I didn't have enough time to prepare and take in all this material in just 2 months and I haven't been that pleased with my Bar prep course, so after I take a break in August, I'm planning on studying on my own again starting in September in case I have to re-take the exam in February 2011.  It's really impossible to spend only a day or two learning each of these subjects, so I really want to take the time and learn them one at a time each week.  That way, I'll know each subject thoroughly and I can layer it on, rather than feeling like I'm just cramming.  It'll all work better for a well-rounded schedule, too.  I can study and also balance errands around the house, going to the gym, and working on my Etsy shop!

I'll know the results right before Thanksgiving (cruel, I know), and I don't want to wait until the last minute (especially with holidays falling in the middle of the prep time) if I have to re-take it.  Ideally, of course, I want to pass on the first try but the odds do greatly increase that you'll pass by the second time at least.  I've known people who passed the first time, and people who've passed the second so I'm confident that it'll happen eventually one way or another.  If I don't pass, then I'll already have a few months under my belt of preparation, and I'll be ready and comfortable for February!  If nothing else, this has provided me with a great learning experience and motivation to forge ahead and succeed.  Law school was a struggle from the start, and although bruised and badly beaten at times, I still survived.  So I will survive again!  I'll try my best, of course, but this may prove to be a bit like a practice run and if I pass, it'll be a pleasant surprise.  If not, then the real deal is February 2011!  It's a relief to feel this way now so there's less pressure and no expectations.  I can only try my best and work hard, and everything will fall into place and be ok.

August is already shaping up to be a busy month.  My sister will return home to LA within the first week, and I'll be re-taking the MPRE a week after the Bar.  Crazy, I know, but I figured I might as well afford myself another chance to pass it before it's administered again in November.  That weekend, the bf and I will help her move into her brand new apartment - which, hopefully, will go smoothly as the management has been nothing but a pain in the you-know-what to her all summer as far as apartment and roommate assignments have gone.  The following week will be spent working on Etsy, looking for jobs...and getting ready for a vacation!  I've been told by a great law school prof that it's a good idea to just get away and clear your head after the Bar.  The bf has decided that he wants to take a trip up the coast to both Portland and Seattle for a week or so.  It might turn out to be a road trip since airfare is expensive and there isn't a direct flight from here, but we'll see.  It'll be good to have the freedom to do things again - I feel like I've missed out on a lot of things this summer.  The trip will include lots of baseball (minor league teams, of course, since those are the bf's favs), zoos, bead shops, food...just fun stuff.  And at the end of the month, one of our couple friends may be coming down to spend a weekend hanging out and going to baseball games (similar to what we did last summer).  At that point, it'll be almost Labor Day weekend, jeez!  And even then, the bf has a family reunion to go to up north...that should be interesting.

I just want everything to work out ok, from the Bar to the MPRE to my finances.  One step at a time, I guess.  For now, it's time to hit the Bar studying grind on this home stretch...Wish me luck!  And see you on the other side :)  xoxo

No comments:

Post a Comment